21

I had chicken pox on my birthday. Yes, on my birthday, and just before my midterm exams.

I should have known.

January 30th.

I fell asleep in the afternoon which was unusual since I have been experiencing trouble sleeping for days now. When I awoke, I rushed to school only to find that our classes were canceled. I came home feeling tired and cold. 

January 31st.

My birthday. I woke up with a heavy head and chills. Then, when I scratched my rib, some fluid came out. I instantly knew something was wrong. I called my sister about my symptoms and she confirmed it. Chicken pox. On my birthday. Just before midterms.

Of course, I went frantic.

And of course, I kept on asking why this has to happen. Why now? Why this? Why me? Yes, I may have been a tad bit overdramatic. But it's just natural to question things when misfortunes after misfortunes come your way, diba? I was so stressed about it that I told my mom that if I don't make it this semester, I am going to quit law school.

Just when I have decided to make things right, to focus, to give all I got to achieve something, just when I was starting to really set my eyes on the prize, this happened. For so long I've been on a journey of finding what is for me. My purpose. What if this is God telling me "no, this isn't for you?" 

Thank God still, I was able to travel back to Tacloban for a few days. We had a belated birthday celebration and I got to spend time with my family and the boyfriend who still gave me a kiss despite my lesions. Nagka-chicken pox na daw sya kaya safe na! Haha

Happy 21st birthday, self. Things may be hard now but you are okay. It's just a disease. Soon everything will be alright. Keep going.